Breaking free of the cage..

I think the last few times my weight had risen to above 340 lbs was in 2003 and 2005 and around 2007. The biggest I’ve been since then is 325 lbs several times. In 2003 I tipped 350 lbs, my feet swelled horrendously, I didn’t take care of myself as I should, was actually very anxious and depressed and felt ugly and embarrassed to be out. My state of mind now is so different now in contrast even though my journey is a little over halfway done. Losing 100 lbs has made such a huge difference in many aspects of my life. I’ve grown stronger mentally and physically and I love being a single, independent woman.

It sucks a bit leaving it this long to finally be getting things right, wish I’d felt stronger then to do something about it but dealing with it now will mean there is much to look forward to as I lose more weight. Being less limited by my physical size really does have a positive impact on my happiness.

This is an ongoing battle, it will be with me for the rest of my life but every year that passes I feel like I’m getting more control over it.

I am determined to reach my 175 lbs goal ultimately but my biggest goal has to be getting out of the 200’s forever and never returning. This action in itself will have such a positive impact on my health and right now this is what is important to me.

Sending much love to everyone who has struggled long term with morbid and super morbid obesity. There is definitely a precipice, a point when it’s far less painful to carry on gaining love and comfort and being soothed by food than the hell on earth trying to wean yourself off the false love it gives you and face the struggles and unkindness of the real world when you venture outside….

Take care, keep fighting

C xxxx


20 thoughts on “Breaking free of the cage..

  1. You look fabulous. Thank you for posting this. I’ve struggled with my weight for most of my adult life and it’s so heartening to hear of your brilliant progress. Keep going- I’m rooting for you. 😘

  2. You look wonderful. And you will reach your goals because you are happier now. I know I am never going back to my weight problem simply because of how I feel at a lower weight. – physically and emotionally. Nothing tastes as good as a healthy weight feels. Even 5 pounds of extra weight can be felt in my bones. The pain and physical effects are tiresome. More to life than sitting with a bag of frozen peas on both knees and gifting the shareholders of pharmacy companies with my constant purchases of their pain meds..

  3. You have done well Carolyn, photos show it all. much healthier!! and health brings many kinds of wealth, including inner happiness. keep those photos on your fridge!! hugs, ann lee s

  4. You are a marathon champion, not a sprinter!

    Even when I don’t get a chance to reply, I’m inwardly cheering you on! I love reading your posts and then following your lead. I’ve been making some of the recipes through your website and was surprised how much I enjoy the ones I’ve tried. So many of them from war time rationing are healthier, and not bad for the budget, either.

    That you don’t give up but instead force your setbacks to be temporary… that’s amazing! Congrats. You deserve cheers!

  5. My dear computer friend and above all, UK 1940’s colleague. Well done my dear wife had a continual battle with weight all her life, but has since gone to be with Jesus, now I know she has no more battle. Keep up the good work. (all the way from darkest Africa)

  6. I have to agree with all of the above!! I love seeing your story, it helps me with my own obese battles!! I’ve also been trying the recipes and love them! I love this website!!

  7. You are looking fantastic! It would be nice if you’d post recipes for what you’re eating now. I need to lose weight myself and I am much inspired by your weight loss. Keep up the good work!

  8. We haven’t heard from you in a while. I know you were having computer issues, and of course you have a life beyond us, but we miss you! I enjoy hearing about your garden, canning, cooking, and more. I just wanted you to know I’m thinking of you and wish you and your family well.

  9. I’ve been reading this blog since it started. It has been a treasure trove of information about the era. I live in Australia by my parents are English and Welsh and told me stories of rationing back in the day. Came back in my isolation boredom to see if I could update my ‘points list’, a list of ration points I try to keep and expand, as finding out how many points a tin of tomatoes back then is nigh on impossible. I just wanted to say, you look amazing and thank you for all the information. It’s a tough year for a lot of us. This current situation has been the widest impacting upheaval and economic shock since WW2. Those back then seemed to have handled it a little better :), but i’m sure we’ll all muddle through. Stay safe and healthy!

    • Nicely said, Gareth.

      I started using the ration points too, before this year started, but for clothes. I liked the idea of being thrifty, but also, as someone concerned about climate change, I took the rationing as a challenge to myself not to be as wasteful. I figured if they could do it then, why can’t I be as strong? I also was able to grow a victory garden this year. I wish I could share with you my tomatoes, as I was very lucky and had more than I could keep up with by eating and canning. I gave tomatoes and other veg away in weekly delivery bags to a few families, but still couldn’t harvest all my tomatoes.. Some folk here are struggling, too. We all need to look out for each other.

      Carolyn is a real gift to all of us.

      I think I found the tomato points, but it seems to be American. A 1 pound 3 oz tin of tomatoes is 16 points. I tried to paste the image here but couldn’t, so I will try to leave a link:

      There were point values for other tinned vegetables, fruits, and juices there also. I had better luck searching for images of ration points.

  10. Well that did not work but I will try one more time. Also… I realized that image would be for ration points for Britain, as the U.K. went metric in 1965. Is my American showing? lol.

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